Last bit

Dr Tang suggested one additional brachy session
.it will be ok .

The Finishing Line

By noon tomorrow, I would have completed my final brachy.

As usual, I'll be sleeping beauty for at least 2 full days . The "drug" that is used to sedate me is rather strong. After each session, I can hardly recall any events that happened. While the drug relaxes my body, my bladder is not spared. My mum and aunt had put me in these amazingly huge diapers. I totally hate them. Not that I don't have a choice about wearing them . I can live in the loo. Haha

Sorry, no visitors till bladder's in good working condition.

Make me zzz

The second and third brachy was more tolerable because I asked to be sedated for the procedure. Dr Tang totally overly estimated my tolerance.

Dr Tang, thanks for being so gentle with me . It doesn't hurt when I wake up.

Doc ordered loads of rest this weekend and suggested no visitors .

Scary Brachy

Yesterday was my first session of Brachy. I am still trying to recover from the trauma. I dont think I can post details of the treatment as it will either make your cringe or "flag" this blog. All I will share is it involves 3 metal L-shape rods (about 20cm long) and tons of discomfort. It took 3 hours. I wonder if giving birth is easier.

I came out of the treatment in total shock. I couldnt cry out. I just sat there with my mum. Pale.

I got 4 more sessions to go. I hope it gets easier.

This is the last lap. This is the last lap. This is the last lap.

17 August 2008

25 down, 9 to go.

Been Chemo girl again. It's become a routine. I will feel quite well right after chemo and the effects come in after 3 days. This time round, I'm not so tired. Things were alright except for last night. I had chronic stomach spasms again. It feels like my intestines were going to explode. You should know by now that I have very low tolerance for anything that has got to do with my stomach.

I have lost another 2 kg over the past couple of days. The Livestrong band (Youth Size) that I've been wearing now hangs midway on my forearm. If only weight loss was so easy when I was healthy.

Brachy starts tomorrow. I'm not thinking about it. Just take it in stride. If it got to hurt, I will just have to bear with it. The pain will go away eventually.

P.S. Some comments got deleted accidentally. Sorry.

Vanity

23 down, 11 to go.

Went to see the doc today. He emphasized that the Brachytherapy is a SAFE and SIMPLE treatment. He told me not to worry too much about it. Painkillers will be on standby.

He wants me to go for 1 more chemo next week (i tot my last one was yesterday). He says it will be good for me.

He examined me and told me that my tumour in the cervix seems to have strunk, it doesnt seem to protrude from my cervix anymore.

I'm feeling well today, I drove myself to the hospital. I havent drove for a month. I really miss driving.

I even went for Manicure and Pedicure.

I think I'm getting well, cos Miss Vanity has returned. :)

Weight Loss

I lost 7.5 Kg over last week. 3 Kg was water retention from the Chemo and 4.5Kg of mass. (Doc says its normal to lose 10-15% of my weight during the treatments. Weight loss usually comes towards the end.)

Am waiting for Marie France Slimming Centre to endorse me. hehehe

Brachytherapy

22 down 12 to go.

Next week, I will be starting on Brachytherapy. There are 6 sessions in total and is p art of the Radiotherapy programme. This is the toughest part of the course. All these while, the RT involves just external beaming, but Brachytherapy will beam internally. My cervix will be expanded (info: a woman's cervix will expand only during childbirth.) Doc says it will be rather uncomfortable but he promises that all treatments will be "humane".

Frankly, I dread Brachytherapy, but this is the last lap and I must complete it. I did my last chemo yesterday. I must get well soon. I miss my independence.

My Pain

Life with the "IT" bag is not as easy as it seems to be. Besides emptying the bag regularly, the discomforts that come with it is plentiful. Though it has been 2 weeks since the procedure, my back still hurts. I cant sit up for too long as it tugs. So, lying down all day is a good choice.

When I drink water, I can almost feel the "suction". It is very uncomfortable. I wonder if half the water I drink gets processed by the left kidney or its a different ratio. I get stomach spasms too. Got to stick with this bag for another 2 months. The next review with the urologist is in Oct.

R-Rated
RT has burnt the insides of my rectum. I cant find a word to describe the pain. All I can say is that every trip to the loo leaves me in tears. Really got to "tar han". Hope this is the darkest of my journey.

Everybody stay healthy.

Zzzzzz

20 down 14 more to go

I've been Chemo girl for the past few days. My energy level is all time low. I've been sleeping, waking up just for the loo and RT. I've lost my appetite too.

Things will get better, right?

Home Sweet Home

17 down, 17 more to go. (I've completed half of it! Yay!)

"The longer you stay in hospital, the more faults the docs will find on you. Better get out soon. " Anonymous

I'm home, finally. I've been in hospital for 2 weeks. This is the longest stay since. I've even spent my Big 3 birthday in the hospital. The bill came up to $13,000. I've spent almost $40,000 on this nightmare. I'm so glad that my bank will be paying part of the expenses. Medical expenses are getting really expensive these days, I had to pay almost $1300 for being a pin cushion, each time they fix the intervenous plug, it costs $55 (excluding the price of the plug which is $25). Better load up your critical illness insurance.

I'm feeling good today. No fever, no pains, nothing. Just kinda bloated (3Kg) from the yesterday's chemo. There's an improvement, I put on 4 Kg in the last chemo. Maybe it's gonna be just 2Kg next week. Fingers crossed.

I will be getting well soon. I cant wait to take a holiday. My friends will know that if I werent sick, I will be in London/Paris now. I can even tell you where exactly I will be. My travelling routine is rather standard. I am such a habitual creature. I take the same route when I sight-see and stop to take pictures from the same locations. This is how much I love London and Paris. I'll be there 2 times next year to make up for the "missed" trip. :)

The "IT" Bag

16 down, 18 more to go

Sorry, I havent been posting for the past 4 days. I had to lie flat on my back to apply pressure on the part where they have inserted the tube to the left kidney. I took the opportunity to catch up on some sleep.

On Friday, the docs decided to remove the tube from the kidney since no infection was found in the kidney. The docs said that I had to do a scan to make sure that my ureter was not blocked by the tumour before the tube can be removed. (The ureter connects the kidney and the bladder). If my ureter is blocked, urine will be stuck at the kidney, causing it to swell and in time, fail. I dont wish to be caught buying myself a kidney from Indonesia.

When I was at the procedure room, the doc injected some liquids into the tube. I can feel my bladder and intestines filling up. It was extremely uncomfortable and I was hyperventilating. My ureter is indeed blocked my tumour and the tube cannot be removed. Docs had suggested putting a stem in the ureter to stop the blockage. But they said the chances of a successful procedure is only 50%. I have decided to not go ahead with the stem. I will live the tube and the urine bag (The "IT" Bag) till my tumour gets smaller (which wont be long).

My fever has gone off in the past few days. I had my chemo and RT today.

Am all ready to be discharged tomorrow. Home Sweet Home... Yay!!!!!